Cecily O’Connor
RedwoodAge.com

Why is it so hard to accept wrinkles?

Do the airbrushed images of celebrities in magazines set expectations too high? Do crow’s feet remind us of our mortality?

“Our society can be very ageist,” said Dr. Joanie Gillispie, a psychologist and author. “Baby boomers are scared of getting old.”

That fear, often heightened among boomers who are caring for their own aging parents, touches upon two distinct needs of any individual: approval and acceptance.

Turning 50 or 60 is difficult for boomers who are wrestling with the feeling that their outer shell doesn’t reflect the youthfulness exploding inside. Not to mention the very act of aging is its own emotional roller coaster, especially for women.

Self esteem plays a key factor in motivating millions of boomers to undergo cosmetic surgery or other treatments.

In this four-part series, RedwoodAge.com will delve into psychological aspects related to surgery, reasons why boomers are choosing procedures, and the costs and risks of nips and tucks. We'll also explore holistic alternatives to plastic surgery for boomers keen on taking a natural approach to aging. 

“There are older woman who still believe they can look as good as a 20-something, and all they need is a tuck here or a lift there,” said Beverly Mahone, author of “Whatever! A Baby Boomer’s Journey into Middle Age.” “They get caught up in the whole idea of looking beautiful because they still want that same image.”

“We look in the mirror and see gray hair, sagging breasts, and then you have menopause to tack on to that,” Ms. Mahone added. “For some woman that's a lot, and they try to masquerade that as much as they can.”

But turning to cosmetic surgery for a mask is not viewed as the healthiest course of action, given the physical and emotional risks. Also concerning is the fact there are no known studies examining the long-term effects plastic surgery has on patients’ self-esteem, according to Dr. Canice Crerand, a clinical psychologist in the division of plastic surgery at the Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia.

'In Her Own Skin'
Looking older doesn’t have to be viewed negatively. Some men and woman wear wrinkles like badges of honor. It’s easier to make peace with your aging body if you decide how you want to age, and take an honest approach to carving out that path, said Debbie Tren, a California psychologist.“There’s nothing sexier than a woman who’s comfortable in her own skin,” she said.

While the jury is divided on whether media and magazines are to blame for boomers’ fears, the dissatisfaction with physical signs of aging is palpable. The number of men and woman going under the knife continues to soar. Yet it’s surprising that baby boomers would tinker with Mother Nature considering this generation has always strived for natural way of living.

“You would think (boomers) would be the example of what it's like to grow old gracefully,” Ms. Mahone said.

The thing is, cosmetic procedures like Botox and mini-facelifts are increasingly touted as ways to help boomers, especially woman, appear 10 or 15 years younger. Psychologists interviewed by RedwoodAge.com generally agreed that these types of cosmetic procedures are preventative medicine against the signs of aging, and as such, can significantly benefit a boomers’ esteem and self-confidence.

Some boomers feel as though aging “is taking a toll on their quality of life,” Dr. Crerand said. For example, they may be “afraid to get intimately involved because of fears about how people perceive their body. They derive esteem from their appearance.”

No matter the circumstance, it’s important to remember self-esteem isn’t just about external fixes; it comes from within, too. And emotional dangers can arise when boomers have unrealistic expectations about what surgery will achieve, or how their job, or marriage might change as a result.

As Dr. Crerand put it, procedures “are not meant to be interventions for major life problems." It’s the duty of plastic surgeons to screen patients to understand their motivations for having surgery, as well as know when to intervene and advise against a procedure.

Right or Wrong?
According to the American Society of Plastic Surgeons, there are two categories of patients who are “good” candidates for surgery: those with a strong self image who are bothered by a physical characteristic they’d like to improve or change; and patients who have a defect or flaw that has diminished their esteem over time.

Experienced plastic surgeons can usually identify troubled patients during a consultation, and may not operate. Or they may recommend counseling to ensure the desire for physical change isn’t hiding an emotional problem. Individuals who may be advised to seek counseling prior to any consideration of surgery include those who are motivated to have surgery because of their need to improve a relationship or job prospects, said Dr. Bruce Cunningham, past president of the American Society of Plastic Surgeons and a plastic surgery professor at the University of Minnesota.

Red flags also are raised by surgeons when they meet patients who have unrealistic expectations, like insisting on having a George Clooney’s nose with the hopes they’ll achieve a better lifestyle.

“I try to access whether the problem is as serious as they think it is,” said Dr. Allan Parungao, an Oak Park, Ill., plastic surgeon. “If I can’t really see there is going to be much improvement, I turn them away.”

Dr. Gillespie said the first things she tells patients considering surgery is to take a “wellness inventory.” Are you getting enough sleep and eating right? If you’re run down, that will be reflected in your appearance.

“If you have major depression, or substance abuse," she said, "the nose job isn't going to fix that."

Read All Four Parts:

Part 1: Why We Do It 

Part 2: Surgical Strikes

Part 3: The Costs & Risks

Part 4: Natural Alternatives